As you all already know, I am a diehard Anakin Skywalker fan and would have used that as my screen name except I discovered about 2,000 other people who were also diehard Anakin Skywalker fans. Anyway, I have been thinking a lot about Anakin's conversion to the dark side. I know many people have blogged on this very topic, and if you've discussed this angle then I apologize.

My question is simply; why? Sure he had always toed the line (and even crossed it sometimes) when it came to the restrictions of the Jedi Order, and he had even defied them on some occasions. But nine times out of ten, the issue he was in opposition over was the welfare of somebody. He saved people with his own little gaudy flare, and he enjoyed doing it. If that meant occasionaly dipping into the dark side for a "boost" then so be it. He got married in secret, (even though he was willing to forsake love for the greater good) and was as devout a husband as any woman could dream of. That passionate devotion may have blinded in some areas, but when it came to doing right he almost always did the best or at least second to best thing. In episode 3 he flies with Obi-Wan to save the Chancellor, he kills Dooku, and they return to Coruscant heroes still. He gets some private time with his wife, and he should be happy.

Then the council starts laying into him and Palpatine begins to spin the final web of lies and deceit to lure him into the dark. All through this, even as he weighs the scruples of the Council, the words of Palpatine, his love for Padme, and his own moral inclinations in his mind, he does no evil. If anything he suffers because doing right goes works against him this time, because it is not particularly something he wants to do. Yet he does is anyway. His best friend leaves on a dangerous mission that should really be no problem, but he wants to go with him so he can leave all of this senseless turmoil behind. He stays because his place is on Corsuscant and if something happens the Jedi will need him. He discovers that the man he has deeply trusted with some of his deepest secrets is none other than the malicious enemy he'd been searching for all of this time as well as the manipulator of the entire war. He follows the Jedi Code, and does not kill him on the spot.

He goes to the most antagonistic Master on the Council with this news, and when the Master tells him to stay in the Council room until they return, he obeys. He could have insisted that he go along; after all they did not have time to waste on such an argument. Yet he did not. But in the Council room, when he emotionally connected to Padme via the Force something happened. Something inside of him decided that he was wasting his time trying to do the right thing all of the time. Something (I'm leaning towards the doubts that Palpatine had planted and grown) convinced him that he was finally going to do what HE wanted, and the Jedi could suck the space dust off of his boots for all he cared. In the end we all know that that very decision ended up meaning ill for everybody; Palpatine included. But nevertheless; why? If he had come this far, why throw in the towel now? Padme was not in any real danger, but if that forbidden knowledge was all he was after, he could have snuck into the Holocron rooms while all of the Masters were gone.

How often do we do the same thing? Do right, and follow what we know to be the objective truths (even though a popular rumor has it that there is no such thing) only to give it all up at the most crucial moment? My question to you (as well as to myself ) is the same as the one I had for Anakin. Why? What compelled you to not complete the race given to you? And since we all have histories, then we know that the moment we decide to give up is probably when we should set our face a little stronger, and persevere like never before. And knowing this I ask again; Why?
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