ENTRY 26: January 26, 2007

This is a reposting of my story from a way back. Tomorrow will include the posting for Empire and then I'll see if I can get the one together for Jedi. Originally I was going to post a bit about Ralph Bakshi, but I want to get more info before I go writing about the Bad Boy of animation and Star Wars. Stay tuned, though, it will boil some blood.

A long time ago......

It was a long time ago, but not far from where I am sitting right now. I am working in a building that is only 3 blocks from the historic theater that showed Star Wars in 1977. The Rivoli Theater has sadly gone away to make way for a corporate office and parking lot, but I wax nostalgic every time I pass by that corner.

A little backstory: I was born into a very strict Baptist family (they've loosened up a bit now) where I was forbidden to watch this horrid movie entitled Star Wars. There had been an audiocassette making its way through the congregation that warned parents of the evils of this new space fantasy movie. This film was to chip away at the very heart of us youngsters taking away our religion. It stated that the movie was about wizards and witchcraft and that the director and actors must also be Satanic if they are even taking part in this attrocity. So there you have it. I was strictly forbidden to see this movie. I was also not allowed to watch The Wizard Of Oz. Now, on to the real story...

I remember the day as though it were yesterday. I was outside playing with my best friend Troy. We were shooting basketball in the driveway (this is, after all, Indiana). We were talking about how neat this new movie looked and wondered if we'd ever get to see it. I pretty much knew I never would. As the morning passed and lunchtime approached, Troy's dad came by to pick him up and surprise him. They were going to see Star Wars!
His dad yelled across to me. "Hey! You wanna go?" My reply was a sad, "I don't have any money." I didn't want to tell them I couldn't go.

"No problem! My treat!" he yelled back. Well, I was going to have to tell them.

"I can't go because I'm not allowed to see it." My reply was not nearly as loud as the other shouts I had given. Troy and his dad came closer.

"Really? You're not allowed to see it?"

"Yep."

"Well, where's your folks?"

"They're at work."

"When will they be home?"

"They get home around 5:30"

"Then you got no worries. Come with us. The show's at noon and we'll be back by 3:30. Your folks'll never know."

Wow. Could I actually do this? Could I actually directly disobey my folks and not get caught? This was going to be the first time I had ever intentionally done something that I was told not to do. I did it.

We hopped in the car and drove to downtown Muncie. This was quite a risk, as my mother worked at the public library directly across the street. I didn't care. My heart raced as we pulled into the parking lot of the theater. The anticipation was killing me. "What are you doing?" I thought, "We don't need popcorn or anything, we've got to get in there and sit down." And so we finally did.

As we walked in to the dimly lit theater, we looked around for our best vantage point and we found it. In the balcony, against the rails, sitting on the floor with our feet dangling over the edge....perfection.

The previews (yes, it was only previews then, no commercials) ran far too long. I could care less about any other movie that was coming, just the one I was there to see. The lights went darker still and then......

Brrum bum. Brrum bum. Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrum bum.
Da da da da.....

The 20th Century Fox logo appeared on the screen. Then, the all so familiar words appeared on the screen.

A long time ago.
In a galaxy far, far away.......

The screen goes black for those few fateful seconds and then BAM! The introductory brass of the Star Wars theme nearly makes me jump over the guardrail as the yellow outlined letters finally appear, spelling out the title for our most awesome fantasy. Then the all too familiar plot setup scrolling off into the furthest reaches of space. I could hear nothing except the sounds of the movie. I could see nothing but the awe inspiring images that were in front of me....and the ships hadn't even entered the screen yet.

The large spacecraft flies into the scene, shooting at something behind it. Then we see "it". The star destroyer goes on forever. What was once a large spaceship is now a tiny craft in comparison to this one. Oh my.

The cut inside when we see the two droids and Threepio is worried about what will become of them. The soldiers are looking up as they prepare to face anything that comes their way. The tension so thick that you could cut through it with a knife. I sat in disbelief as the larger ship comes to rest over the Tantive IV. "Look at the size of that thing!" I thought.

Now the moment of truth. What was going to come through that door. What was going to happen. The white door begins to smoke as it is burned open. It blasts open, we all screech in unison. In come the Stormtroopers. These guys didn't look cool, they looked super cool! What followed completely took my breath away.

What could possibly follow that would make the Stormtroopers stand at attention.......none other than the Dark Lord himself. Darth Vader. The primo bad guy. I was speechless. I was hooked.

For the next hour and fifty minutes I sat motionless. I couldn't believe all the things I was seeing. A beautiful princess gets captured but still stands up for herself. C-3PO and R2-D2 go on their own little adventure, the Jawas, Luke, The Sand-people, Ben. This was too much to soak in. The introduction of Han and Chewbacca. It all blurred together.

The confrontation bewtween Obi-Wan and Vader. I had been a small fan of the old swashbuckling movies but never had I seen swordplay such as this. Ok, the workmanship wasn't the best, but those glowing blades hitting and flashing. I was so worked up that I shouted, "NO" when Obi-Wan was cut down. I hadn't noticed that he had disappeared with a smile. I was so upset. How could such a great guy get killed. I believe I started to tear up a bit. This just wasn't possible. I was down. I was bummed, for about 2 minutes. Until Han blasted out of the Death Star and the Tie Fighters attacked. That brought me back. I cheered with every Tie Fighter that exploded. Maybe not out loud, but inside, where it counts.

When the final Tie was destroyed, I could breathe again. I honestly think I held my breath through the entire fight. Now it was time for the calm before the storm, as the rebel leaders look into the information stored in R2. When the verdict was read, I sat in disbelief. How in the world were they going to hit a tiny target like that and destroy this evil space station? I already knew that I was going to be disappointed in the outcome of this movie. There was no way in the world they could do it. Keep in mind that I was not a movie-goer, so I had no way of knowing what to expect.

As the rebels take to their ships and the Empire is estimating time of arrival, my tunnelvision became even more focused. There was nothing else that existed outside of that movie screen. I watched in despair as rebel after rebel was blown from the sky, but cheered whenever they happened to land a shot that sent an explosion through a hallway. I was amazed that the rebels might actually pull this off. They were able to avoid the big cannons. They were going to do this! They were going to win!

Then Vader decides to join the fight. I knew there was going to be trouble. I knew that he was going to win. And win is exactly what he did as soon as he joined the ranks of the fighter pilots. Of course, his TIE was quite a bit cooler than the rest of them. I cringed as he took out this rebel or that rebel. But nothing got me as much as seeing the torpedoes get launched and only hitting the surface. To see his shots miss and then get killed. What a thing to be your last memory while alive...failure.

As the trench run continued and Luke was one of three making the run, I was once again engaged in the possiblity that they just might make it. Then, here came Vader. Once again he easily gets rid of those in his way. Biggs is blown up and Wedge has to fly off. I was so angry when Vader told the pilots to let that one go.

The cutting back and forth. Luke, Vader, Luke, Vader..........30 seconds to position. OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

29.....28.....27......

"Trust your feelings, Luke" What was that??!! Remembering Obi-Wan's voice?

"The force is strong with this one"


"I lost R2!" NO! How could they kill off a droid! First Ben and now R2!? I couldn't blink. I was so in awe of what was happening. I was chewing my nails to a bloody pulp. OH NO! Now Vader had Luke in his sights.

"I have you now"

The display of Luke's X-Wing being lined up in Vaders sights and locking in....... This was not to be a fair ending! This was not going to be a movie that ends the way it should. This was going to be one of those movies where they trick you to teach you that life isn't fair. And then the laser fire.

"What the..."

"You're all clear kid." Han, Chewie and the Falcon swoop in from overhead. Vaders wingmen swerve, crash and send Vader spinning off into space! AHA! Got you mr. bad guy! But wait......the death star is now within range!

"Commence primary ignition." No, they can't do that! Not after the rebels have fought so hard to stop them. They just can't win!

"Use the force Luke. Let go of your feelings"

Luke closes his eyes in a moment of concentration. I certainly can't close mine. The buttons are being pushed to fire up the super cannons. Luke is flying closer. The small lever is being brought down, the super laser is charging. My heart is racing. I'm white knuckling the guardrail. Then Luke finally fires. The photons go straight in. Is it really going to work?

As the ships flee the Death Star it erupts in a ball of flame. IT WORKED! THEY DID IT! THEY DID IT! But poor R2. Poor 3PO. Lost his best friend and even offered to donate some of his parts. How long had they been associated with each other? Can droids really feel? I think I was as heartbroken as 3PO.

The theater erupted in a wave of applause. The cheering continued through the award ceremony and in to the credits. I couldn't stop looking. I sat through the credits much to the dismay of Troy's dad. We stumbled out of the theater into the harsh sunlight. Why, this had to be what it was like on Tatooine.

The chatter continued into the car. "Did you see......" "Can you believe..." "What about......" "....was the coolest..."

We arrived back home by four and there was no way that my parents were going to know the pure thrill and excitement I had just experienced. My older brother already knew I had gone and vowed not to tell a soul. This was so cool. I thanked Troy and his dad and headed back inside my own house.

"Vwom. Vwomm", I made the lightsaber sounds as I walked in.

"Beewww. Beeewwww", the laser sounds were going off in my head.

I ran straight in to tell my brother how great this movie was and that he was sure to want to see it. He listened closely and thought it sounded pretty cool, but still a kid's movie. With me being 11 and him 14....he was still a kid!

I sat in my room trying to draw what I had just witnessed, without much luck. I turned on the television hoping to see commercials for this fantastic movie I just saw. Any glimpse of being able to any scene again was worth sitting through any number of bad shows. I was lucky enough to see three commercials air before shutting the TV off at 5pm. I had to let it cool down before anyone got home from work. It was a big console television and those took a while to cool, especially in the hot Indiana summers.

At 5:30, the parents came in and the evening began as normal.

The Return of the Parents

The time was at hand. At 5:30 on the nose the front door unlocked and in came my mother followed closely by my father. The normal hand on top of the television gave clues that it had been on some time recently, but that was dismissed to cartoon watching and waiting for them to return home.

Mom, in her usual daily question asked what we did today. "Did she know?" had my brother sold me out to get something he liked? I began to sweat. What was I going to do? What was I going to say?

"Oh, not much." I stated. "Hung out with Troy most of the day."

"Ok." was her reply. Go get cleaned up, then, and we'll eat in about 15 minutes."

I went back and washed my hands and face. The pictures of the day were still swirling around in my head. I could still hear the music and sounds washing within every scene. I went back into my room and pulled out whatever toys I had to make them act like Star Wars characters, nothing like re-creating the pivotal moments in a movie with 12" G.I. Joes and little green army men. It didn't matter, though, these toys became my Star Wars actors and with some imagination, tanks could be flying TIE fighters and pencils made excellent scaled lightsabers for the Joes.

"Time for dinner!" the call came out. My brother pushing me back into the room so he could get up the hallway first. "I'm gonna tell!" He turned and looked at me. The evil look on his face..."Oh no you're not or I'll tell!" he had me. There wasn't another thing that I could ever tell on him about. I was now in the grasp of his tyranny. He could mold me however he pleased because he had information on me that could destroy me.

As we sat at the dinner table I was as figity as could be. Then, without even thinking about it, I started talking about Star Wars. What was I doing? I couldn't stop, though. I went on and on and on about how great this movie was and that everyone would like it and dad would especially like it. Suddenly I found that I could stop. When I looked at my mother, who was giving the most angry eye a mother can give without literally burning a hole through a person. I looked over to dad for his take on things and he was smiling....my brother looked as though I had just taken the one thing away from him that he treasured, and I suppose I did.

"I thought I told you not to see that movie." my mom said. "I told you not to go and you went anyway. How did you get there? How did you pay for it? What are we going to do to punish you?" These questions and more were presented to me while my dad said nothing. Finally he spoke, "So, how was it?"

Well, that opened the gates even further. I went on and on about the entire experience and asking how they could make things like that. My dad was a filmmaker at heart but a draftsman by design. He had the best Super8 equipment he could buy and always shot great home movies and air shows. He understood my fascination with this movie. He had seen the commercials and there had been articles about groundbreaking special effects in his movie magazines. I was off the hook. Star Wars was mine!
It was mine for a couple minutes, anyway. My brother chimed in to remind dad that I had completely disobeyed them and that something should happen. Well, something did happen. I was grounded.
I was grounded while they were home and I had to go to work with my mom. The timeframe was set at a week. I could live with that. So I went to work with mom at the library. The first chance I got I tracked down the Star Wars novelisation and began reading it.....AND it had pictures in it from the movie!! I read the entire book in 2 days and then re-read it and spent Friday looking through any magazine that had articles about it. After seeing how much I loved the book and that my attitude hadn't changed and I wasn't practicing witchcraft or wizardry, that, maybe, Star Wars was ok. She still wasn't happy about it, but she seemed ok with my liking it.

Remember me saying that the theater was directly across the street from the library? Well, I decided that I could go to work with mom often and see the movie over and over. As it ended up, she was ok with that. I got to see Star Wars every day. It was only $2 to see a movie at the Rivoli and get a soda. After several viewings, the theater owner let me see it for free whenever I came over. That meant that I was getting a stockpile of money, which led to the purchasing of figures. All in all, I saw Star Wars over 40 times in its opening summer. Some days I'd watch it twice, I'd go with friends on the weekends. It was fantastic!

My dad frowned a bit on the money I was wasting seeing a movie so many times. "You know what happens." he'd say. Word spread quickly through my family about my fascination with the movie. One aunt gave me a copy of Star Wars to read and then told me to keep it. Any money I got would be saved up to buy a figure. I wanted more but couldn't afford them. Dad would not budge on the "wasting money" aspect of the toys. I was also not allowed to touch his super8 equipment even though I just knew I could make a feature just as good with my figures and die cast metal ships (one X-wing and Vader's TIE).

Fascination grew to obsession over the years. When Star Wars was finally put on television on HBO, I was at my friend's house all the time. An uncle had this new gadget called a VCR and so he taped it. Even though there was a copying signal run with it and made watching it a rough thing, I would reel it up over and over. My dad ended up buying a super8 reel that highlighted parts of it and he would watch that with me as well.

All in all, I have exceeded the 3500 viewings of Star Wars long ago. I still pop in the DVD at work or , preferably, the laserdisc at home with the real OT and not the special editions. My few toys have grown into a 35 page collection and a room in our house. My wife isn't a huge fan but is ok with the movies and gets a kick out of my collection. My daughter, through no influence of my own is fan as well. We had a great time at C3 and she accompanied me to the midnight showing of ROTS. My dad will come and see what new things I have and gets as much enjoyment as I do out of seeing it all. He sees what I've put into it all and knows what it's worth, but there is no price that can be put on the bonding that Star Wars has brought into our family.

The circle, indeed, is now complete.