"Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough,
but your uncle wouldn't allow it."
Kenobi, Ep. IV

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Did Luke have any idea how his encounter with Kenobi that day was going to change him?

Did he have any idea that this seemingly small mechanical device held within it more than a weapon, but a history, and more than that, a destiny, and even more than that, a destiny that could change from light to dark and back again?

Did he realize how his entire life was about to transform, something he wanted his entire life, just not in the way he could have possibly anticipated?

Transformation, as we all know, isn't easy. It can be confusing and messy. Be it from one school level to the next, from one job position to the next, from one city to the next, and from stage of maturity to the next. However, when complete, it can be truly wondrous, though it can be tragic too.

I've undergone some difficult transformations myself over the past few months. In many respects, it has impacted me in ways I hadn't anticipated. I'll start with the most successful transformation: my eyes.

I had laser eye surgery on May 9th, 2007. From a distance, the procedure is remarkably fast and simple. From my first appointment until my surgery was approx 2-weeks. I did my research and prepared myself for my first visit, which went a long way in speeding up the entire process. The surgery, as many of you know, took all of 30-minutes. I wish I could say my post-op was entirely pain free but it wasn't. Just hours following surgery, my eyes burned in a way I hope never to repeat. Thankfully, after that first day, the intensity died down significantly, disappearing entirely the day after that leaving only some minor irritation. I suffered from some expected side effects for the next 4-weeks. I can say by the fifth week those side effects had disappeared almost entirely. I now have 20/20 vision; there is a possibility it will improve more than that over the next two-to-four months. I've been told by my doctor that 20/15 is actually considered perfect vision.

Having spent 30-years in the 20/200+ range and then going to 20/20 is miraculous in ways I can barely describe. I am lucky and thankful that I had the courage to pursue this procedure, the physiology to handle it, and the means to pay for it. I wish it was available to anyone who wanted to pursue it; the prices are coming down but it is still expensive. My surgery cost approx $3800 in total and it included everything from pre-op to post-op appts, all my tests (which they repeated several times), and most of my meds. The cost was the same whether it was for tradition Lasik, Epi-lasik, or permanent contacts. The type of lasers used also had no impact on the price. Yes, you can probably get it for cheaper depending on who you go to, just be sure of whom you're dealing with. Just as with any surgery, risks abound, so make sure you're dealing with a Yoda and not a Palpatine, savvy?

Because of this surgery, I have had to postpone my blogging. It was just too difficult to read and type with my vision fluctuating over the course of my recovery. I tried to comment as often as I could but more often than not, I simply shied away from the Star Wars blogs. Further complicating this issue, and still complicating it, is my job. It's been a year since I accepted some additional duties at work but only now has the reality of my decision begun to impact me. And it has had the impact of colliding 16-wheel trucks on a major highway. I can barely keep up. Frankly, because of the lack of activity over the past year, I haven't learned much either. So, it's been ever more daunting trying to keep up with the workload while also trying to understand half of what I do. I'm surviving but it isn't much fun. It's even less fun because it's taking time of way from things I actually like to do, like spend time on my blog, and communicate with you all. At times, it's downright depressing.

As a result of this lack of blog activity, I have taken what time I could to actually meet and greet some of the bloggers I correspond with. I didn't want to lose touch entirely and I thought I was being kind of a snob avoiding such encounters so I thought I'd give it a try. I can say it's been awkward and fun. I met and had lunch with the blogger known as jediprincess77. I sincerely enjoyed it (and the cookies). The next opportunity was to be a visit with three other bloggers at an evening concert in Chicago's Millennium Park. Unfortunately, I had to cancel due to conflicting appointments. I hope to have another chance to meet with JediMelindaWolf, JediPug1, and ewanandhaydenfan5, in the next few months. The final opportunity came in the midst of my previous cancellation. With much speed, I met with
The Stooge and his family, along with jp77 again. As with my previous visit, it was awkward and fun. I'm just afraid I'm going to have nothing interesting to add to the conversation. Anyway, talk I did, with Stooge, his wife, and jp77 as we made the grand march up to the Lego Store to visit with R2 and Anakin.

It was during this meeting that Stooge reminded me of a blog challenge I set aside so I could contend with my eye surgery recovery and employment issues. I admit I was taken aback by this. I hadn't forgotten my challenge entirely but I was surprised that anyone else remembered it. I was immediately embarrassed. No one likes to be reminded that they are shirking their responsibilities but it appears I was. I suppose in the grand scheme of things my blog is just that...a blog. However, I now wondered if I was disrespecting this small community and taking it for granted. I think I was; I think I am. Adding to this was the reminder that blogging allowed me, and inspired me, to write. My blog, in many senses, has transformed what I perceived to be a worthwhile activity...more on this later on.

I believe it was late last December when I proposed that I would use what time I had to write more and to draw more. Looking back on the past 6-months, I'd say I have not done so well. I don't blame this entirely on my own distractions. Goodness knows plenty has occurred that I had no control over what so ever. Still, I have not been able to make a transition from casual blogger to serious writer. Now, you could say that's fine, we do what we do with what we have...that's life. However, am I really using my time wisely? Has anything really changed? And can I change if I really want to? The easy answer is we can do whatever we want to, but that's naïve. It takes great effort to change, to transform into something else, even if that something else is what you were meant to be or what you always were.

Like Luke, like Anakin, like Leia, and so many other characters in Star Wars, their plans were to change themselves and/or their surroundings. Mysteriously, they achieved their goal but never in the way they thought. What's the lesson here? Be careful what you wish for, you might get it? Is it something subtler? Schmi indicated to Anakin that you can't stop change. Maybe it's something even more powerful than that: not only can't you stop change, you have no power to control it. Maybe all you can do is prepare as best you can and hope for the best. Perhaps that's the key to the entire transformation process: just hoping it will all work out.

I hope I can complete my blog challenge soon, I hope I will continue blogging, and I hope I will make more time for writing.

Thank you for your patience.

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01-18-08...this party's over.

I've seen Transformers twice since it opened. I love it! I'm not going to pick it apart like so many others have. I am a fan of the G1 series and the 1986 movie and I had no particular issue with the character portrayals and story presented in this film. I guess I'm just not that picky. All I will say is see this on the big screen if you have any desire to see it at all...Giant Robots are meant to be seen on a Giant Screen - you will not be disappointed.

In both instances, a particular preview played before Transformers began. The preview itself is jarring. I won't spoil it for those who haven't seen it yet. No title is given, just that it's a movie produced by J.J. Abrams and 'In Theaters 01-18-08'. After doing some research, I found out a bunch of information including some possibly related websites referencing someone by the name of Ethan Haas. Suffice to say, after reading all this stuff and playing the puzzle/games, I do not believe the movie to be about Godzilla, the Book of Revelation, or (for god's sake) Voltron.

It was during this research that I felt compelled to comment on some of the so-called 'viral' sites as to who and what I think this movie will revolve around. As I was commenting, I was again reminded of why I like blogging and writing. It's just fun; it's a lot of fun. Its fun finding the right words to describe feelings. Its fun developing the structure of a sentence. Its fun organizing the overall layout so as to maximize your impact. All of which is to meant to do one thing: communicate your thought. Writing is a fun medium.

I believe this preview communicated its thoughts effectively and provocatively. It is the level to which I aspire with everything I write to include what I write in my blog. I want it to be enjoyable, exciting, interesting, thoughtful, and hopefully worth some of your precious time....because based on this movie, not much time is left.

I'a, I'a!

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What's Green, White, and Red all over?
Answer: Me and my blog.

As some of you noticed, my blog title has changed.
For the remainder of this week, I am dedicating my blog to 'greenandwhitejedi'.

Here's why...

It was during my recent second visit with jp77 that I was handed a gift...a gift from greenandwhitejedi. I have never met with nor spoken to GWJ personally. I'm not even sure we've ever emailed each other outside the blogs. Despite this, he brought a gift with him from Scotland to California only to have to pass it on to someone going back to Illinois so that ii could finally be placed in my hands since I could not attend CIV.

Needless to say, I was extremely touched by this and it reminded me of how much I missed in not attending this event. The gift is wonderful and a fitting tribute not only to my crazy ideas about Order 66 but also to GWJ himself as it is witty while also being rendered in vibrant GREEN and WHITE!

It's perfect!!!

To GWJ, I say THANK YOU...please note, I do not suffer gifts well.