Today we have six handy tips for use when encountering a Moose. Using them should increase your survival rate. However, how true are they? Let's take a look...

What do you do if you spot a moose: "Usually if the moose is standing on the trail you want to wait for it to get out of the way. Moose get the right of way. You can try clapping at it to make it move. Sometimes you can do that but you have to use that with some discretion if they're acting agitated."

This is mostly true. However, for the record, clapping is annoying to a moose. Clapping is annoying to most sentient beings. If I'm behind you on the expressway in a traffic jam, shall I walk up to your car window and start clapping to shoo you out of the way? I think not.

Don't be alarmed at the "agitated" part, though, especially here on the StarWars.com. It just means I'll look at you sideways. But I look at everyone sideways. Humans are funny looking.

What's a safe distance from a moose: "20 feet is not safe, but usually you can do it. 100 feet is safe, or a couple house lengths."

To put this in terms we can understand here at StarWars.com, a safe distance from me is 7 to 10 blogs or 1 full forum page.

How to tell when a moose is getting ready to charge: "They'll put their ears back, raise the hackles on the back of their neck and lick their lips."

Hackles? I have hackles?

My general rule of thumb (hoof) is you will know if a moose is charging on the message board when you can actually feel text from the screen striking you about the face and shoulders. Follow these steps: Stop, drop, and roll. Lather, rinse, repeat. Drink, drive, rationalize. Run away.

What to do if a moose charges you: "Jump out of the way or get behind a tree. It will run at you and if you turn and run away it'll usually stop and look at you, but if you stand your ground they'll rush at you."

I also recommend screaming and perhaps soiling clothing - your own or someone else's - doesn't matter.

What not to do: "Throw rocks or snowballs at them or get between a mother and her calf."

Never, never mess with the females. I know this one.

Why: "You really don't want to stress a moose out. They're much bigger than you."

Size matters not. It's how mindless and evil meese are that matters.

}:0)

Love and pineconez,
DM out