OK, so today, I had some free time on my hands, so, I thought why don't I go to Google Video and watch the Holiday Special everyone has been raving about? During the viewing of the Holiday Special, I found myself laughing. A lot. It was a sum of a majority of things, such as Itchy, Chewie's grandpa, who seriously needs to fix his jaw. Or it might be Lumpy, who sounds like a cross between a braying donkey and a dying cat, yet, cute at the same time.

As George Lucas has claimed, he did write the original story of the Holiday Special, attended some meetings and worked on the animated segment, but that was it. The rest was handled by variety-show guys, namely, director Steve Binder and producers Joe Layton, Jeff Starsh, Ken Welch and Mitzie Welch. Also, Lucas' USC roommate, David Acomba, was originally hired to direct, but was fired due to "creative differences", or, he actually knew what the #### he was doing.

At the beginning of the Special, we see Han and Chewie being chased by Star Destroyers. It is obvious by first glance, that the director was too ####in lazy to shoot new scenes, so, used old footage from Star Wars. We then see Chewbacca's family, Itchy, Lumpy, and Malla, who if I wasn't told, would not know if she was a female or not. For what seems like lightyears, we hear the various growls and yells from the three, with no actual English dialogue. My, oh my. We then see Lumpy watching some trapeze artists, which is kind of........well, out of place? Yet, Lumpy's reaction is really cute. Then, we see Malla search for the Falcon to no success. Then she contacts Luke, who was a very discernible haircut. She then contacts Saun Dann, who is selling to some Imperial chump, whose voice is an obvious voice-over, and gives a clever hidden message to Malla. This is probably one of the smartest and original things in the whole special. Then, we see a deleted scene of Vader from Star Wars, Oh please, as if your 1 million budget wasn't enough to shoot a 5 second scene.

I don't want to go through the whole special anymore, just the parts worth mentioning.

So, Han comes out of hyperspace, fighting stock footage TIE fighters with stock footage of Luke and Han shooting TIE fighters. We see Leia, and I believe Carrie Fisher is on something during the special. I don't have anything against her, I love her, but damn! look at her eyes. Saun Dann then shows an Imperial officer Jefferson Starship, which he seems to love. Nothing wrong with that. Then we watch the cartoon, which is kind of funny, although advanced during 1978, wow, it looks messed up now. Han looks like someone got a rolling pin and used it on his face, and Luke is now taking drugs, Yet, the Boba Fett appearance is always cool. Lumpy then gives another cute reaction to the cartoon. Then, here comes the part, where it touches my heart, Lumpy seeing his room after the Empire went through it. Through all my viewings of Star Wars, nothing made me more wanting to kill stormtroopers than this scene. Lumpy, then doing a pretty cool thing, uses his translator to trick all the stormtroopers away. Oh, and by the way, the instructional video was kind of not funny. Sorry, Harvey Korman. We then see the cantina, which is supposedly to make the Empire feel better about themselves. As if oppression and senseless killing was moral enough. We see Beatrice Arthur sing a modest number. Later, the Wookiees then magically appear in red robes and in a starfield, where we are treated to sensitive speech from Han and a rendition of the main theme song from Leia. This is where it is truly evident, that Fisher is on something. Then, Chewie, has flashbacks, yet it looks like he is having a mindlock, a la THX 1138.

Some other notable events was Saun Dann's gift to Itchy, Diahann Carroll, or the holographic wow.

Holographic wow: Am found in your eyes only eyes only - I am in your mind as you create me. Ohhh yes... I can feel my creation...
[giggles]
Holographic wow: I'm getting your message - are you getting mine?"
Itchy: [######ic sounding] ARRGGHHHUGHH!
Holographic wow: Oh... oh... we are excited, aren't we?

Holographic wow: I am your fantasy. I am your experience. So experience me. I am your pleasure. Enjoy me. This is our moment together in time that we might turn this moment into an eternity.

If you watched it, you know how sexually charged her tone is, add that on top of Itchy's reaction which is *shudders*. Also, Chef Gormaanda, the four armed chef with the cooking show, which was kind of um. Sorry Harvey Korman.

Chef Gormaanda: It's not only a very hearty, nourishing dish, but it's very economical, too. So all those hungry mouths in your household will be going "yummy yum for their tummy tum." If you just follow along with me as I prepare this popular favorite.

George once said that if he had the time and a sledgehammer, he would smash every copy. Looking from his point of view, I would say the exact same thing. Even if Lucas was not supervising the special, the producers could of at least tried to make it good, knowing they were making Star Wars. Yet, it has its moments, like Lumpy and some comments here and there.