There was once this kid... A long time ago in a Galaxy Far Far Away ... His name was Phil Moskowitz, he was only 16 when he got a job at the prestigious Naboo Power and light. After the Droid invasion, Phil was tasked with cleaning up things and soon found himself at the bottom of a long shaft. "EWW" he thought as he picked up the remains of two halves of a severed creature in black robes "No lunch for me today" But beneath the Red and Black faced creatures body he came across Two Light Sabres... one in reasonably good shape and one that appeared to have been cut in half "Now there's something you don't see every day" and he slipped these curiosities into his tool box..
Years latter, through Contacts in the Royal Family, Phil got himself a job in the Elite Republic "Crisis Janitorial Team". One of his first jobs was cleaning up Genosis after the Famous first battle of the Clone Wars. While moving Debree from a hanger to make way for the Heavy cleaning druids, he made a Grizzly discovery, there in the rubble was a hand, in that hand was grasped a light saber. "I'll be a Jawa's uncle" he exclaimed as he slide the saber into his tool box "What are the chances of that?"
His Sterling service to the Republic continued, he had helped solve the Sewer Crisis on Dola 7 , he had been covered in industrial goop during the clean up of Trelas and even weathered the harsh conditions on Libok to aide in cleaning up after the annual Krekre day parade. One day, during a well deserved leave on Corscant, he was seeing the sights around the Chancellor's Tower... He heard it before he saw it, a whistling, increasing in volume, he glanced up just in time to duck a falling light sabre clasped in a severed black hand. "Hmmpf" he thought as he scratch his head "Going to have to get a bigger box to keep these things in" and he picked it up and carried it home.
Soon he was back to work, these heady times had seen the birth of the Empire and the final battle's of the Clone Wars, he went with the army to Utaupou, as part of the 325th Elite Janitorial clean up team. Phil lead his squad into the trade federation HQ for a RCUS (Rapid Clean up and Straightening), he was utilizing his MkII Floor sanitizer when he stumbled on two robotic hands, in these hands were two light sabers "Zowie!" he reached down and put them into his tool box.
He was recalled to Coroscant with the army, during the purge of the Jedi, and chosen personally to lead the clean up of the Senate chambers, as he moved one of the pods, there on the floor was a tiny little Light Sabre. "Aint that cute" he mumbled as he placed it into his pocket.
The years passed, he now worked for the Empire, he was chosen to head a Janitorial squad for a top secret project, he thought it would be the key to his advancement through the ranks of the IJS (Imperial Janitorial Service) but he found himself stuck on the Death Star for Decades. One day, while on call, the big board lit up signaling a Janitorial emergency, he and his Sanitizer moved out as they had many times before. When he arrived there in a access hallway to a hanger bay, there was a pile of robes laying on the floor, he bent over to pick them up when a Light Saber fell to the ground "You have got to be kidding me" he muttered as he slid the Saber into his tool box.
Little did Phil realize that this was his last Call, as he Retired not more then a day after ( Luckily to, for he read that the Death Star had Blown up trying to save Alderan). He traveled abit but soon answered a advert for a Environmental Cleanser. Bespin was a peaceful place, a place where a man could hang his light saber collection in pride. Phil spent his days traveling in his little open cloud car, removing industrial pollution form the clouds around the city. All was well in his life, sure there was a increasing imperial presence, but hey! That meant security. One day while scrubbing he was nearly knocked unconscious by a peace of falling debris, Cursing he climbed back to his feet and looked down at what had hit him, there, Clasped in a severed hand, was a light saber. "For the love of ...." He grumbled and slid it into his tool box.
Soon the imperials were in charge of the city and he received a summons to the commanders office, it seems that due to his experience, he was needed to head a department on the New Death Star (cleverly called Death Star II), he knew he couldn't refuse so he soon found himself in gray overalls scrubbing familiar floors.
One day during reactor shaft Maintenance he heard a familiar noise, a Whistling increasing in volume, Phil simply stepped to the side with the assurance of a veteran as a mechanical had grasping a light saber crashed into the floor plating. "UG!!!" he cried as he picked it up and put it into his tool box "That's it!! I quite!!" angrily he stormed to the shuttle bay, only slightly aware of the screaming and thump behind him. As he arrived in the shuttle bay things were crazy, people were running around here and there, steel beams were falling, "somebody is going to have to clean this up... and it ain't going to be me" and he climbed aboard a waiting shuttle.
He was only slightly shocked when the pilot showed up dragging a Helmet less lord Vader behind him. He was only slightly aware that he was missing a hand. Soon they were on there way to the Sentry moon, Phil couldn't help but notice that the pilot had a Light Saber on his belt. To himself, the aged Janitor mumbled " Damn Jedi...Nothing but a bunch of litter bugs".