For those of you who don't know what I look like, I have long blond hair. With that, much to my dismay, comes many, many so called "blond moments." When I was a kid, I got my growth spurt pretty quickly. Practically overnight I suddenly had long arms and legs that I didn't know what to do with. I was ridiculously clumsy for the longest time. Now, though, I'm just clumsy, not ridiculously so.

I haven't had a real blond moment for a long time, so tonight, Fate decided to make up for lost time. Fortunately I was alone when it happened, so I could deny that it ever took place because no one would ever know. However, for some strange reason, I've decided to share this with the seven million registered users on this site. Go figure.

To make a short story that became long a short story again, I'll cut to the chase. I fell out of the shower...and landed on my face. My shower is like a hotel shower where it's the bathtub with a shower head on one end. I was stepping out, and I noticed the bath mat had gotten all bunched when I stepped in the shower. So I was trying to straighten it with one foot before stepping out again. I started to wobble a bit, so I tried to steady myself, and I thought I had. Suddenly, though, I heard a loud "thump!" and discovered I was laying on the floor. It was actually kind of surreal because I didn't feel myself fall. I just sort of realized I was on the floor.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure they'll be a nice big bruise on my face tomorrow morning where the bulk of my weight hit the floor. I also managed to hit the edge of the tub on my right thigh and my left hip as I fell, as well as bloody up my elbow a bit (which I just noticed while typing this). I'm trying to come up with a better story for how I got the bruise because, while I don't mind telling totally strangers about my clumsyness-ness, I really don't want to admit it to the people I actually come in contact with on a day-to-day basis. So far I've only been able to come up with having a boyfriend who beat me, but since everyone I know knows I don't even have a boyfriend, that won't fly. Plus, losing in a fight against my shower curtain would be closer to the truth, and that's an even worse excuse. That would put me dangerously close to "not being able to fight my way out of a paper bag."

I should be embarrassed by this event, but instead I find it really, really funny when I think about it. In fact, that can be said about most of my blond moments, which is why I'm going to share them with you as they happen. I know you're thrilled with this news.

So the moral to this blond moment is either get a non-slip bathmat or don't take on your shower curtain in a fight; it's tougher than you think.