The holidays are an interesting time. They seem to encourage us to set aside our differences and ignore what separates us for just a moment. Perhaps we feel the need to clean the slate and disregard the past for the sake of enjoying the time we have together. At least this is the case in my town/home/heart. This year, however, that is something I cannot do. I refuse to ignore the fact that I have messed up. I'm going to rip off those band-aids if it means the wounds I've caused in others can finally heal properly. This entry is dedicated to two very special people (sorry to be all "inside" about it, but you know who you are), and though my pal Sithy may never read this, we've talked about it already, so I know he's gotten the message. But, at the same time, this is meant for ALL.

I don't think the world likes to admit when it's wrong, or apologize when such words would solve a great many problems. How do I plan to change the world? By changing myself.

To everyone I've ever (and never) met:

I'm sorry.

I'm sincerely sorry that you've been hurt, that you are hurting right now. I'm sorry that you've lost something or someone dear to you. I'm sorry that violence, selfishness, hate, and greed reign in our society. I'm sorry for life's injustices. I'm sorry that bad things happen to good people. I'm truly sorry that life is so often unfair. But most of all, I'm sorry for everything I've done to contribute to that. I've said and done things that shouldn't have been. Moreover, I've not said and done things that desperately needed to be. Who am I to accept a situation for what it is, instead of trying to make it better? Who am I to not be there when you need me most?

For every time I've let you down or not stood up for you, I'm sorry. For every time my pride won the battle over humility, I'm sorry. For every time I should have apologized, but didn't...I'm sorry. I know this can't make up for all those times I've come up short, but I pray it's a start. I'm all about new beginnings these days, so please forgive me and help me start over.

As they say in Star Wars:

TPM

"Oh, sorry!"-TC14
"Sorry. Whosa are yousa?"-Jar Jar
"I'm sorry."-Padmé
"I'm sorry I wasn't able to finish you, 3PO."-Anakin
"I'm sorry for my behavior, Master."-Obi-Wan
"I'm sorry for my deception..."-Padmé

ATOC

"Milady, I'm so sorry."-Cordé
"Sorry, Master, I forgot you don't like flying."-Anakin
"I'm deeply sorry, Master."-Anakin
"Sorry Master."-Anakin
"Sorry Milady."-Anakin
"Sorry Milady."-Anakin
"I'm sorry."-Anakin
"I'm sorry. I don't have a choice."-Anakin
"Then, I'm sorry old friend."-Dooku

ROTS

"Sorry Master."-Anakin
"I'm sorry, I was held up."-Anakin
("Forgive me, Master."-Anakin)
(Master, I've disappointed you...I've been arrogant and I apologize."-Anakin)
"I'm so sorry."-Obi-Wan

ANH

"I'm sorry, Sir, but he seems to have picked up a slight flutter."-3PO
"Sorry about the mess."-Han
"Sorry!"-Wedge

ESB

"Sorry, sweetheart. Haven't got time for anything else."-Han
"I'm sorry."-Lando
"I'm sorry too."-Han
"I'm sorry I couldn't do better but I've got my own problems."-Lando
"I'm terribly sorry about all this. After all, he's only a Wookiee."-3PO

ROTJ

"I'm terribly sorry. I'm afraid he's ever so stubborn about these sort of things."-3PO
"Oh, I'm terribly sorry!"-3PO
"I'm sorry."-Luke
"I'm sorry."-Han


Forcefully,
JP

P.S. I think you should check out these Star Wars films. They are full of important life lessons and other fun stuff. I'm pretty sure you will like them.