Much has been made about the actual scale of Imperial Star Destroyers and Super Star Destoyers, as well as other ships, moons, battle stations and whatever war machine whatnots one wants to run a tape measure across.

The argument raged on, at some times completely out of control, in particular 2 years ago. People swore. They rendeth their cloaks and there was much gnashing of teeth. Mighty alliiances were made and people were voted off various islands. It was an ugly affair.

And of course I am not here to start the argument again, neeeuuuuuu - nosir. But I did want to bring up an interesting idea.

People always assume that the Star Wars galaxy is just like ours. Since we've never left our galaxy, well then, how would we know? The fabric of space may contain many havens of oddity. The Star Wars galaxy could very well be one such bubble in the space-time continuum. Therefore, those trusty Laws of Physics we apply here and assume apply everywhere - well - might not. We just don't know. Work with me here.

So, for instance, there might just be a place where there is sound in space -- perhaps its not a perfect vacuum. There might be a place where light beams can be terminated and shaped. There might even be a place where this weird ether called "The Force" exists.

All this leads up to my own hypothesis about the Star Wars galaxy: It's really tiny.

That's right, while we're all arguing about if a Super Star Destroyer is 12,800 or 16,000 meters long, we might want to understand what a meter is in the Star Wars galaxy.

My theory - the Star Wars galaxy could very well be about 350 miles wide. You could drive across it in a Honda Civic on one tank of gas. It rotates about 20 times an hour. Time and measurements are compressed. And because of this unque scale, meters are really fractions of an inch there.

So if an Imperial fleet shows up on our doorstep some day from the farflung reaches of deep space, it'll bombard us with itty bitty turbo laser batteries from ships roughly a foot and a half in length. They'll deploy teeny weeny AT-AT's to the surface to take out our communication and governmental centers. Some will be carried off by squirrels and cats.

Perhaps even a miniscule Death Star will show up, trundling around our globe like a new Sputnik, feebily trying to blast us into oblivion. Fear will keep us in line. Fear of this widdle biddy battle station.

And hey, while we're screwing with the variables, since their scale is so much smaller, they might not even be that far far away by our standards. It might be out there somewhere beyond Pluto, just too small to see.

So should the argument ever arise again, goofy as it was, as to exactly what size these things were in actual life, consider that George Lucas may actually have full-size mockups in the Lucasfilm archives. Heck - they might even be the real thing and that's where he birthed all these cool ideas.

Just something incredibly shtooopid to think about. From my itty bitty brain to yours.

DM out