"I think that when people hear the president speak, frankly they think he is stupid."

Video: President Bush's Secret Speechwriter
(Quicktime video)

My major passions in life include Star Wars, and watching George Bush mess up during his speeches.

"Fool me once, shame on...shame on...you..."

(awkward silence)

"...you can't get fooled again!"

Although this jewel remains our president's finest:
"After standing on the stage, after the debates, I made it very plain we will not have an all-volunteer army."