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Oboe-Wan's Hive of Scum & Villainy
date posted: Feb 04, 2007 10:16 AM
Exploding Star Wars Toys Series Part 8: Transformers
Super Bowl Sunday is upon us and the spirit of friendly competition is flourishing in the -Wan house this morning. Today's mission: transform the Millenium Falcon into Han & Chewie before Padawan-Wan throws a fit.

Gentlemen: start your engines!!

In this corner we have Hubby-Wan. Highly frustrated by Transformers but tolerates them in his home because Santa dumped a buttload of them off at Christmas and he knows Santa does not like to hear about it. Seated next to him is Padawan-Wan - does not yet understand the technique involved with Transformers but fully enjoys watching his parents transform them for him.

And in this corner we have.... Luke & Leia Skywalker. Luke is in town for a vacation & instantly the Skywalker siblings love ganging up on Hubby-Wan because he is so easily riled up (especially over these darn Transformers). The Skywalkers, in their youth, were highly skilled at Transformers & GoBots, their skills rivaled only by the toy testers at Hasbro.

Our moderator today is Mara Skywalker, newly acquired bride of Luke, trying desperately not to offend her hosts by laughing too hard but of course delicately feeding the ego of her new husband.

Our mission: to tear apart the Millenium Falcon Transformer (which yours truly put together on Christmas morning - no help from Hubby-Wan) into Han & Chewie action figures in the shortest amount of time. Our tools: coffee & our bare hands.

Game on.

Hubby-Wan begins by tearing apart the Padawan's bedroom in search of the directions, Luke & Leia calmly sip their coffee while Padawan-Wan proceeds to separate Han & Chewie's halves from the ship. Hubby-Wan returns with the directions & settles down at the dining room table. Padawan-Wan gives Hubby-Wan the Han portion while the Skywalkers take on Chewie.

Working together the Skywalkers get Chewie's legs & feet into their proper positions but struggle with the brute strength that's needed to open the arms. Too much pull & we could destroy this toy forever. Hubby-Wan is still working on the 2nd leg, convinced that things should "click" into place, we hear a lot of tsking & sighing from behind us.

Chewie's arms are opened & the hands unfolded into their full extended position. Luke wonders where Chewie's head can be found, the answer to that question is simple - I pull down the "exhaust" and out pops the half-Chewie/half-robot head. In celebration, the Skywalkers growl in their best imitation of Chewie to show their victory to Hubby-Wan who, diligently following the written instructions, has just begun work on the arms.

Luke & Leia go back to sipping their coffee while Padawan-Wan runs off with his new totally whacked out looking Chewbacca Transformer. "Um, guys? You forgot a part," Hubby-Wan says, handing us the cockpit to the MF. "This goes on his shoulder like a grenade launcher." Ah-hah! He thought he could beat us by withholding parts! No such luck.

Padawan-Wan returns Chewie Transformer to us, we snap on the cockpit & we now have a 100% complete Chewie. Done. Team Skywalker is victorious in a landslide!

Hubby-Wan can be heard grumbling & growling at the "stupid Transformer" for 5 more minutes.

I'm not sure how this exactly qualifies as an "Exploding Star Wars Toy" but at this point I think it's the title that's catchy & fun, the toys provide the entertainment, and the veins in Hubby-Wan's forehead embracing the "explosion."

nob01
Oil Bath Bubbles
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 11:10 AM
Wow - you almost have a complete cast in your family - time to break out out the fan-film cameras!

My congratulations to Team Skywalker :)

I'll hold back on my 'bah humbug to Star Wars Transformers crossovers' comment in the spirit of joviality and a laid back Sunday. ;)
  rj_peters
Memos from the Imperial Finance Department
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 11:25 AM
Good stuff! Sounds like Hubby-Wan needs to let go of his feelings and use the Force...;
jediprincess77
I Know...
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 11:51 AM
Have you guys ever thought about doing a reality show? I'd tune in every week. My intial reaction would be to vote off Hubby-Wan, but I think I'd rather he stuck around. You gotta have that one guy that always gets frustrated so everyone else can find amusement at his expense, ya know?;)
Granny-Wan
I Am NOT an Old Fossil!
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 1:08 PM
I just can't get used to the idea of Star Wars Transformers... it'd be like having Chewbacca on Star Trek, or Daffy Duck and Donald Duck being best friends....

It's like mixing matter and anti-matter..... I feel my head exploding.... B-)
  Hranitel Arhiva
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 2:48 PM
I love these! :^O Did Hubby- wan survive the explosion?

Amused Statement: That for a very funny picture.

Shut up HK
JediPug1
Like My Father Before Me
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 3:30 PM
Fun! Just like being there. :D
MomOf2YoungPadawan
Mamadala's Lair
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 3:30 PM
Agggghhh...I feel your pain. My Padawans also have this Transformer, along with Anakin, Jango Fett and Grievous. Oooops, scratch Grievous - after two weeks of pure Transformer hell with that one, we put it in our yard sale last summer! Sometimes, what's great in theory isn't always realistic in practice...especially when you have kids with the attention span of a Gungan in need of Ritalin! :p

Thanks for the giggles!! :D :x
  Oboe-Wan
Oboe-Wan's Hive of Scum & Villainy
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 8:07 PM
My congratulations to Team Skywalker
Congratulations accepted. :D

Good stuff! Sounds like Hubby-Wan needs to let go of his feelings and use the Force...
Sure does! He's a bit sithy with these Transformers. Though can't say I blame him...

My intial reaction would be to vote off Hubby-Wan, but I think I'd rather he stuck around. You gotta have that one guy that always gets frustrated so everyone else can find amusement at his expense, ya know?
ROTFLMAO!!! :^O
  Oboe-Wan
Oboe-Wan's Hive of Scum & Villainy
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 8:09 PM
I just can't get used to the idea of Star Wars Transformers...
Well, my official stance on these Star Wars Transformer pieces of #### is... they are poorly conceived & just pieces of junk. I don't know why I broke down & bought the ones we have, but I definitely regret it.

Did Hubby- wan survive the explosion?
Nothin' a little coffee can't cure.

Fun! Just like being there.
Oh good!! I'm glad I was able to convey a bit of the fun that was this incident!!

  Oboe-Wan
Oboe-Wan's Hive of Scum & Villainy
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 8:11 PM
after two weeks of pure Transformer hell with that one, we put it in our yard sale last summer! Sometimes, what's great in theory isn't always realistic in practice..
That is where ours may end up this summer. we'll see...

We have:
Boba Fett/Slave 1
Anakin/Jedi Fighter
Obi-Wan/Jedi Fighter
Darth Maul/Sith Infiltrator
Han & Chewie/Millenium Falcon

That's 5 too many in my opinion...
JediMelindaWolf
Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try.
date Posted: Feb 04, 2007 9:29 PM
Lovely mental picture, oboe-wan!


:^O :^O :^O


MTFBWY :)
  Hranitel Arhiva
date Posted: Feb 05, 2007 7:36 AM
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. You quoted me! you quuoted me!quoted mwahahahahahaha. aihahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaa *snip*

Degected statement: I apologise most gifted and evil Oboe-Wan.]:) I just couldnt find my dart gun anywhere. Please do not pay attention to my Master he is a bit..... urestrained.

shu... p... HK *snip* ow.

Amused statement: The things I could do with a gun...
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