There'd be fewer blogs if it went a little something like this...


INT. POLIS MASSA MEDICAL CENTER

Obi-Wan: Hold on Padmé. You'll be all right...

Padmé: ... Obi-Wan... the children... you must.

Bail: Master Kenobi, I was thinking.

Obi-Wan: What? Senator Organa I'm -

Bail: You should probably consider an alias. A pseudonym. A way of avoiding the Empire.

Padmé: Please... there is still good...

Obi-Wan: Could this at all wait, Senator Organa?

Bail: I was thinking something simple. A name like Ben, perhaps?

Padmé: Obi-Wan! There is still good...

Obi-Wan: What?

Bail: Ben. It's a nice name. I think one of the Boonta Eve Podracers had that name.

Obi-Wan: I didn't actually see that Podrace.

Bail: Really? I thought you said when you met Anakin he already was a great pilot.

Padmé: GAHH!!! UGH...

Obi-Wan: He was. I just heard about it after the fact. Qui-Gon was at the race. He told me all about it.

Bail: Qui-Gon? You didn't mention that.

Obi-Wan: Well, I don't mention him very often. He's dead, you know.

Padmé: GAAAAGH!

Bail: Yes. I can see how that would stop you from bringing him up during a casual aside.

Obi-Wan: So, Ben, you say?

Padmé: AAGGHHHH...

Bail: Yes. Ben Kenobi. Well, you should probably drop the last name. But either way, it rolls off the tongue.

Padmé: GAAAHHH.. ARRRRAAAAGH...

Obi-Wan: All right. From this moment on, I'll be known as Ben Kenobi and will not go by any other name.

Padmé: UUGHHhhh... ooohhhh...

Baby: WAAAAGH!

Medical Droid: It's a boy.

Obi-Wan: I should make a note of this moment. I'll probably want to recall it later.


***

And also... basically the same joke:

EXT. MUSTAFAR -- LAVA RIVER

Obi-Wan: You were the Chosen One! It was said you were to bring balance to the Force, not leave it in darkness!

Anakin: I HATE YOU!

Obi-Wan: You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you.

Anakin: (catches fire) MuuAAAARRRGHH!!

Obi-Wan: I'm taking your lightsaber now. Unless you say otherwise, I'm going to assume you would have wanted this passed on to your offspring.

Anakin: GAAAAAHHH!!! RAAAAAGHHRRRR!

Obi-Wan: I do not hear any objections. I am also assuming that you would have wanted him to have it when he was old enough.

Anakin: AAAAAA!

Obi-Wan: Right ho, then.


****

And maybe...

EXT. ALDERAAN BALCONY

Queen Organa: Oh, Leia. You will so love Alderaan. It is your home, my little young one.

Bail: She is truly wonderful. But I feel that she should perhaps know her real mother and the sacrifice she went through to bring her into this world.

Queen Organa: Can we risk it?

Bail: A few images in her room would not draw much attention, I think.

Queen Organa: What did you have in mind?

Bail: Well, I had the R2 unit provide me some holograms. What do you think?

Queen Organa: She looks rather sad in that one.

Bail: There's more. This one?

Queen Organa: Eh... still pretty sad.

Bail: You're right. Let's go through these. Sad. Sad. Sad. Wow, these last few years were a veritable drought for smiles.

Queen Organa: Do you have any of her looking kind?

Bail: Sad. Sad. Sad. Oh, what about this one?

Queen Organa: That's kind of sad.

Bail: Sad. Sad. Sad. I'm going to switch to the second disc.

Queen Organa: That's one not too bad.

Bail: She's still sad.

Queen Organa: True, but she looks kind and sad.

Bail: Okay, we'll go with it.


***

EXT - TATOOINE - MOISTURE FARM - DUSK

Owen: Was that the Jedi who called ahead?

Beru: Yes. Obi-Wan Kenobi. He dropped off the baby as he said he would. But didn't otherwise say a word.

Owen: Blasted Jedi. Why must they complicate things? He could have at least said a thank you.

Beru: He said so on the com earlier...

Owen: Don't make excuses for him Beru. It's like I always said. Anakin should never have gotten involved with them.

Beru: You always say that?

Owen: Yes, once Shmi moved in with us and I saw how much she missed him. I said he should have stayed here, when he was nine, and not gotten involved with the Jedi.

Beru: Oh.