While having lunch at a Chinese restaurant with a good friend recently, I was discussing an unfinished blog entry... and when the check came, I opened my fortune cookie, and this is exactly what it said:

"It's time to complete some unfinished business."

Weird, huh? Well anyway...

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Something crossed my mind while watching The Empire Strikes Back recently.

Is it just me, or does it seem that everyone in the first part of the movie is fighting? All good friends who have been through alot together, who have risked their lives fighting for a cause, and are having a rough morning, I guess (no coffee on Hoth, I suppose?). Artoo and Threepio are bickering over the treatment of clothing and weather conditions, but then again, that is pretty much normal for them. They're one of the most bickering "couples", so to speak, in movie history, but they sure do have each other's back. They've been through alot together, and they're not really gonna go their seperate ways. Well, not if Threepio has anything to say about it....

Han and Leia are going at it, mostly because of hidden feelings on both sides and Leia's desire for Han to stay, and what I also believe to be Han's desire, albeit hidden, to want and be asked to stay... especially by Leia. Think about it... his whole life he's been a good smuggler, been on an adrenaline rush performing a dangerous job, but it's apparant he feels the need to do something bigger and more valiant than just working for himself for once. Of course, the always-cool Chewie goes along for the ride. Perhaps they were not expecting to help out, and to in a way help lead the Rebel Alliance for as long as they did, but I think they, and especially Han, stuck to it for a reason... they finally found a few true friends. Witness Chewie giving Luke a big ol' bear hug while they were fixing the ship as Luke was departing... the worried look on Han's face and the comment "Be careful"... do you honestly think they ever felt that way about anyone else in their smuggling adventures? I doubt it.

We also see Chewie and Han arguing and in a frenzy over getting the Millenium Falcon patched up, and they're bickering with each other... it just makes me think that in real life, it's okay if you are friends with someone and unpleasent things happen that can cause discomfort or ire. What really matters is the history you have with another person and what you are willing to give - and recieve, in the friendship. It makes me think about my real-life friends. We don't always get along perfectly, but we all care for each other and are there for each other. It can also be that way with my family.. but hey, isn't that a given?

Well, getting to a point here, I suppose. At what point do we draw the line with people... is there an imaginary line in our hearts and our minds where we just can't take it anymore and say "That's enough!"? Sometimes in life we value certain people more than they value us, and then there are situations where we are highly valued by someone we have respect for, and like... but that's where it ends. It's not that we don't like that person, we do... just not as much as they like us. Maybe it just depends on your mood that day, or your point of view at that period in your life. We all go through so many things in life, often together, leaning on each other for support. But what do you do when you suddenly realize you are being crushed? A friendship should be a two-way street. It's so difficult when a friendship begins to revolve around another persons problems, and only that.

I take my friendships seriously. I think about all of the people in my life, people who are a part of my life... and I am so lucky, blessed and grateful. There are so many twists and turns in an often bumpy, dark and nasty road in life... it really is so necessary to have people around you who really care, and are willing to receive that love in return.

I've always been there for my friends, but there is only so much I can give. We all have our own stuff to deal with. It's sort of impossible to help someone out when they have no real desire to help themselves. And I completely support them feeling the same exact way. It's just so difficult when they don't feel that way and you feel completely dumped on. If I choose to ignore the overbearing behavior or complain, I feel like a terrible friend and person. Oh, and just in case anyone is wondering, these feelings I have do not pertain to anyone here!



Perhaps I am just overthinking all of this.


Maybe I'm just going crazy!