Following on from 'The Sith Review', in which I measured the Sith Lords of the Expanded Universe against a set of ideal rules, I figured, why not do the same for the Dark Jedi?

Here's the Rules for being an ideal Dark Jedi:


1) Never, ever, find redemption to the light side

2) Have some sort of fancy gimmick that picks you out of the crowd of dark robe-wearing angry-faced villians

3) Kill as many people as you can

4) Hurl verbal abuse at any Jedi you come across

5) Come up with a highly improbable and impractical plan for galactic domination and/or revenge on your enemies

6) Die in a suitably dramatic manner


The dark siders will receive a mark out of 10 for each and a total Score out of 60.

So far; Carnor Jax is in 1st place with a score of 46, Alema Rar and Irek Ismaren are joint 2nd with scores of 44 and 3rd place goes to Brakiss with 42.

Jaina Solo
1) Finds redemption in the very next book - 0
2) A mixture of Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher - 3
3) Kills some Vong - 3
4) Is full of irritating self-righteous rhetoric - 6
5) Kill lots of Vong to make up for the loss of her brothers - 5
6) Still alive - 0
Score: 17 out of 60

Jerec
1) Stays on the dark path - 10
2) Is blind and has tattoos around his head - 7
3) Kills a few people - 4
4) Prefers to whisper menacingly - 5
5) Absorb the power of thousands of dead Jedi and Sith and become a Force God - 10
6) Just a lightsaber duel death - 4
Score: 40 out of 60

Joruus C'baoth
1) Is far too mental to be good - 10
2) Is just a beardy bloke - 1
3) A bit of a killer - 4
4) Spouts all sorts of nutter-rhetoric - 10
5) Create evil clones and dominate other minds with his own - 8
6) Although it is another lightsaber death, he does explode dramatically - 7
Score: 40 out of 60

Kadrian Sey
1) Not a one for redemption - 10
2) Is a Zabrak - 4
3) Kills a few Kiffar Guardians - 5
4) Doesn't talk much at all - 2
5) Just a lackey of Dooku - 1
6) Taken by surprise and lightsabered in half by Quinlan Vos - 4
Score: 26 out of 60

Kam Solusar
1) Has a conscience - 0
2) Looks gruff and troubled - 3
3) Not a killer - 0
4) Not a taunter, either - 0
5) Just another Imperial Dark Jedi - 2
6) Still alive and kicking
Score: 5 out of 60

Kibh Jeen
1) Again, stays evil - 10
2) None that I know of - 0
3) Starts a war that causes quite a few deaths - 7
4) Once more, not that I know of - 0
5) Uses pirates to take control of the Cularin system - 6
6) Simply killed by a couple of Jedi - 4
Score: 27 out of 60

Komari Vosa
1) Another total nutcase - 10
2) Twin lightsabers and dominatrix clothing - 8
3) Personally does for at least twenty Mandalorians - 8
4) Doesn't verbally abuse any Jedi, but ###### off Jango Fett - 4
5) Creates legions of mindless slaves using addiction to corrupted deathsticks - 10
6) Choked to death by Dooku after a big fight with Jango - 8
Score: 48 out of 60

Krdys Mordi
1) Stays mildly nasty - 7
2) Indistinguishable from his colleagues - 0
3) Is a rubbish assassin - 1
4) Very poor dialogue - 2
5) Doesn't think for himself - 1
6) Killed by a mere Jedi Apprentice - 3
Score: 14 out of 60

Kueller
1) A very mean feller - 10
2) Wears a skull-like death mask that looks cool - 10
3) Blows up the Senate, some smugglers and the entire population of Pydyr - 10
4) Likes nothing better than haranguing Luke - 8
5) Blow up lots of people, trap Luke and blackmail Leia - 8
6) Shot whilst confused by the effect of a ysalamiri - 4
Score: 50 out of 60

Kvag Gthull
1) Another mildy nasty one - 7
2) And another generic Dark Jedi - 0
3) A torturer, but not much of a killer - 1
4) More rubbish dialogue - 2
5) Tries to capture the Solo twins (who hasn't?) - 4
6) Shot by a girl - 2
Score: 16 out of 60

Kyp Durron
1) Is redeemed not once, but twice (the wuss) - 0
2) Generic hansome and troubled human - 0
3) Kills his own brother whilst committing genocide - 10
4) Is mostly just petulant - 3
5) Kill Imperials and then kill more Imperials - 5
6) Not dead yet - 0
Score: 18 out of 60

Kyle Katarn
1) Redeemed by the old "I won't fight you" line - 0
2) Has a beard! - 1
3) Not a killer - 0
4) Taunts Mara a bit - 4
5) Just decides to hang around in a Sith Temple - 1
6) Yet to feature in the obituaries - 0
Score: 6 out of 60

Lomi Plo
1) 100% dark side witch - 10
2) Is a melted half-human, half-insect freak - 10
3) Starts a devastating war - 8
4) Is a bit sarcastic until she stops talking altogether - 3
5) Start a war, subvert insectoid governments and bring the galaxy under the dominion of your hive mind - 10
6) Chopped into bits by Luke - 4
Score: 45 out of 60

Luke Skywalker
1) Gets about as redeemed as you can get - 0
2) Looks alot like the actor Mark Hamill - 5
3) Sabotages his own attack on Mon Calamari - 2
4) Just acts all superior and melancholy - 3
5) Learn the secrets of the dark side and use them to kill the Empeor - 10
6) Not dead yet (grrr) - 0
Score: 20 out of 60

Luuke Skywalker
1) Dies as evil as he (briefly) lived - 10
2) Is an evil clone of Luke Skywalker - 10
3) Doesn't kill anyone that I know of - 0
4) Doesn't say a word either - 0
5) Doesn't even have a mind of his own to make evil plans - 0
6) A lightsaber death, but respect for fulfilling the 'You will kill Luke Skywalker' command - 6
Score: 26 out of 60

Maw
1) Dies trying to turn Kyle Katarn to the dark side - 10
2) Is a floating severed torso! - 10
3) More a tracker than a killer - 4
4) Is full of nasty words about the sticking of parental heads on spikes - 10
5) Largely just does what Jerec tells him to - 2
6) A lightsaber duel death - 4
Score: 40 out of 60

Neema
1) Only turns to the dark side in the first place because of peer pressure - 5
2) No distinguishing features that I know of - 0
3) Same as above - 0
4) I imagine she and her mother (Vima-Da-Boda) had one of those horrific mother-daughter arguments - 6
5) No major plans - 2
6) Is fed to rancors by her husband - 10
Score: 23 out of 60

Nikkos Tyris
1) Bad to the end - 10
2) Is a brain-sucking Anzati - 9
3) Takes a Jedi Master down with him - 4
4) Exchanges harsh words with some Jedi - 5
5) Joins the Confederacy and founds a Sith cult - 7
6) Squished in a giant fist of Force-telekinesis - 8
Score: 43 out of 60

Oss Wilum
1) Is really easily redeemed - 0
2) Has a funny nest of squiggly bits on his head - 5
3) Doesn't kill anyone - 0
4) Gets whupped before he has chance to taunt - 0
5) Plans to use Hssiss dragons to kill his former Master - 7
6) All we know is that he's dead - 2
Score: 14 out of 60

Picaroon C. Boodle
1) Is a nasty little bugger - 10
2) Also is a mutant monkey-lizard (apparently) - 8
3) Kills an annoying droid - 2
4) Full of Jedi-taunting mischief - 8
5) Another lackey of Jerec's - 2
6) And another lightsaber duel - 4
Score: 34 out of 60

Quinlan Vos
1) Finds redemption sadly - 0
2) Looks all moody and troubled (God I hate him!) - 3
3) Kills a few people for Count Dooku - 3
4) Only flings denials of his own darkness at other Jedi - 2
5) Infiltrate Dooku's inner circle to flush out the second Sith - 6
6) We'll soon find out... - 0
Score: 14 out of 60

Reess Kairn
1) Gets all guilt-ridden and becomes religious - 0
2) A tattooed Twi'lek with buring yellow eyes - 4
3) Kills lots of Ffib priests - 8
4) Avoids the Jedi - 0
5) Becomes a pirate and hires Shi'ido to impersonate him - 5
6) Killed by Aurra Sing on Endor - 3
Score: 18 out of 60

Rhad Tarn
1) A rather angry young man - 10
2) Just another generic human - 0
3) No kills - 0
4) Shouts at Jeisel a bit - 4
5) Plans to join the Confederacy and destroy the Republic - 4
6) Lightsaber duel death - 4
Score: 22 out of 60

Roganda Ismaren
1) Is too loony to be good - 10
2) Just a beautiful woman (Ha! 'Just' he says!) - 3
3) Probably killed a few people as an Emperor's Hand - 4
4) Taunts Leia a little - 4
5) Turns her son in a battlemoon-calling cyborg freak and allies herself with arrogant Imperial aristocrats - 9
6) Killed by irony when her cyborg freak son runs amok - 7
Score: 37 out of 60


So there we go.
Carnor Jax is pushed down into 3rd place with, with Komari Vosa's score of 48 making her 2nd. Meanwhile, the new Number 1, with a whopping score of 50, is Kueller.

Can anyone from S-Z beat 50? Find out soon.