Like any other Star Wars fan, I was very excited about the return of Star Wars to the theaters in 1999. I was excited to see Yoda again and learn about the rise of young Anakin and how he became the Darth Vader that scared me in my boyhood. As it turns out though, I character I identify most with from the films is not Anakin or Mace Windu, but instead the beautiful Padme Amidala.

As I watched Episode I and thought about it, I was quite surprised when I realized that I identified so much with Padme. As a little boy, I identified mostly with Luke, so I was a bit surprised when watching Episode I to discover that I identified as much with Padme as I did with Qui-Gon. In watching Star Trek and Star Wars over the years, that although I liked female characters, the ones I identified with and wanted to be like were Captain Picard, Data, Luke, and Yoda. Now, for the first time, I found myself identifying with a female character. It was very strange to see so much of myself in a female character and yet the more I thought about it, the more I began to see how much like Padme I was.

I guess it all began in my teenage years when I took an intense interest in politics. I read President Reagan's memoirs for fun during the summer and my high school football coaches would joke about me appointing them to cabinet positions over golf courses if I ever became President. I was also the spin doctor of the football team and became known for my postgame comments that quite often quoted some prominent political figure in American history. In college I decided to study Political Science and even considered attending law school. I love freedom and liberty and worry about what we're doing to protect, defend it, and let all the people of the earth enjoy it, regardless of what nation they live in. Even now, years removed from my college days, I keep up on current events and have very strong beliefs about current events and politics.

The prequels mark the first time we've really seen the political arena in Star Wars, and the two leaders who really see significant time are Padme and Palpatine. My whole opposition to tyrannical dictators and oppressive regimes puts me much closer to Padme on an ideological scale. I love her courage in speaking out for what she believes in despite any risks to herself. I respect and admire her willingess to do whatever it takes, even taking up arms if absolutely necessary to fight for her beliefs. This is not abandoning her desire for peace, but rather an acknowledgment that sometimes you have to fight to protect the peace. Ronald Reagan referred to this as peace through strength.

Political interests aside, my connection to Padme goes deeper, and this is where I identify so much with her. When I was 20 years old I was serving a volunteer mission for my Church in Russia, away from my friends and family for two years. During that time, I was asked to serve as an ecclesiastical leader over a small unit of the church in Russia. I often think of how unusual those days were. At all of 20 years old, I was looked at as a spiritual leader. I felt inexperienced and unequal to the task to say the least. People far older than me were looking to me for guidance. It was a very humbling experience as I spent sleepless nights tossing and turning with concern over whether or not I was helping the people I was responsible for. As I sat in the theater watching TPM, those memories came flooding back to me as I saw Padme's concern for her people. It has been said that leadership can be very lonely. As I watched Padme bear the burden responsibility for the Naboo, I knew how she felt for I too had felt the loneliness and burden. It reminds me of the famous picture of John F. Kennedy with the weight of the world on his shoulders during the Cuban Missle Crisis.

As I thought more and more about TPM, the lonely nights and inadequacy came rushing back, but so too did memories of seeing lives change, not the least of which was my own. Was I ready for leadership at that age? No, but those experiences helped shape me and make me who I am. I learned much about love and compassion for others in those days. I came to care very deeply about the people whom I had been asked to watch over. I did all that I could to help them. I hope that I was able to make their lives better. I saw so much of that in Padme. I was moved by her humility in showing Boss Nass that she viewed him as an equal. She was the kind of leader that I had tried to be.

Soon I began to understand just why I identified with Padme so much. In her I saw a kindred spirit. She was deeply committed to her beliefs, yet also found it more important to go and serve others. In the midst of great sorrow for herself she took the time to comfort Anakin. I hope I was able to do that for those that I served. Padme is different from all the other female sci-fi/fantasy characters because I see so much of myself in her. She also shares so many characteristics with the kind of girl that I've always been attracted to: intelligent, strong, principled, and compassionate.

As Padme's story unfolded in the prequels, I have thought of how tragic her life was, but how in the end, she helped make the galaxy a better place. Even in the end though after much personal tragedy, Padme is true to her principles. She helped lay the foundation of the Rebellion against the Emperor, which Leia would help lead. She would go to Mustafar in an effort to turn Anakin back to the light, and while she didn't succed then, her compassion and love for Anakin would be passed on to Luke. It is poetically beautiful that Luke would be the one who still believes there is good in Vader, just like his mother said mere moments after he was born. That compassion is what would save the day in the end.

George Lucas has said that the dark side of the Force is greed, and that the light side is compassion. It is Padme's love and compassion that helped save the galaxy. It is compassion for others that helps make us human and will make the world a better place.